Monday, September 18, 2006

tampon

so, like this idiot wants to know what i carry with me? is that, like, major creepy or what! I mean, like, do you, like, jerk off while you read my postings? I’d call the fucking police, if like, you know, they weren’t such a fucking pack of sex deprived pigs themselves?

i’ll tell you? what I carry? ok, like, i carry two things? my cell phone? and a tampon? an’ i don’t pay for no fucking tampons! i, like, find them in dumpsters? when i go on my freegan dumpster diving? i mean, like, so much food goes to waste? just sitting in the trash? an’ like, tampons? it's like SOOOO wasteful to throw them out?

yeah, fuck you, i'm saving the fucking ecovironment because i re-use my tampons? i like, squeeze the blood out an' scrape the mushy stuff off an', like, use them again? and again? and again? and again? an' like, professor kurgman sez that i'm like not only saving the planet, but making a statement about my wymwynhood? like fucking PROFOUND an' shit! and like, FUCK YOU MUCH, bush? when the fucking tampon is, like, so over? i send it to the white house? because, like, they're like, sending people of color to war? an' like, you don't even have to even KNOW that this fucking war is in iran or iram or irat or ikod or ipod or WHATEVER!! like, fuck you, i also carry an ipod? an' you can't fucking shoplift these things anymore because of fascist security systems? so, i like just took the money out of my dad's wallet when he was visiting? he was in the bathroom? like probably jerking off? an' like FUCK YOU DAD 'cuz i know where you're stolen money is an' i'm soooo returning it to the people? so i took a handful of money an' stuck it in my pocket next to my tampon? an' bought an ipod?

an' u know what? i'd rather be sticking fucking steel wool up my cunt than a kotex? because kotex is made by kimberly-clark? an' they're a bunch of zionist murderers? i am like SOOOOOOOOOO boycotting kotex! during the lesbanon war? the jews were, like, suffocating muslim babies with kotex maxipads? an' those fucking jews better get ready to call me DOCTOR soon because i'm like thisclose to my phd an' shit? look the fuck out, azzholes, 'cause this bitch is gonna fuck u up! like, phds are, like, never wrong?

just go fuck yourself.

5 comments:

shlemazl said...

Thank you!

I do jerk myself off regularly and this post provided me with fantastic inspiration for many months to come.

Red Tulips said...

The thought of reusing a freeganed tampon brought me joy spasms of delight. Thank you, Kathy, for sharing such beautiful insights. I truly will remember this one into the twilight of my years!

lexcen said...

I could jerk off too if you sent me a used tampon or maybe a dirty panties, ok I'll settle for a bra.

Bacon Eating Atheist Jew said...

Isn't it amazing that the fact that Israelis were using Kotex tampon's to suffocate Lesbanese babies never made it to the media. And people think we don't control the media.

Clampett said...

Sheesh,

You'll die of Toxic Shock Syndrome if you don't stop soon.

p.s,

Kurgman is old-school CIA.

Ask him how it feels to kill 4 POC…um….ask him what he did while attached to the SADF in the Caprivi Strip region of Namibia in December 1979. The answer will be the same.

-ta ta